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+--- Thread: dangerous time of the year (/showthread.php?tid=13654)
dangerous time of the year - csgray - 05-17-2014
We are entering the season of graduations and the end of the school year, when there are a lot of parties being thrown, which can make it one of the more dangerous times for teens and adolescents. The number of intoxicated drivers can really jump at this time, and the combination of inexperienced drinkers and inexperienced drivers is a particularly dangerous mix. Inexperienced drinkers often underestimate their level of intoxication, and inexperienced drivers tend to overestimate both their vehicle and their driving abilities. Combining the two can easily be a lethal combination.
This is a really good time for parents to once again have the "Don't get in a car with someone who has been drinking conversation." With my daughters, we had an agreement: no matter when it was, or where they were, if they did not have a ride home with a sober driver, or in any way felt unsafe, they were to call us and we would come and get them. We promised we would not get mad or yell, although there would be a conversation about the choices that led to them being in that situation in the morning.
In many ways this is a conversation you need to start having in middle school, early high school is almost too late, and of course once they drive the conversation changes to "Don't drive while intoxicated." Things like news stories about accidents involving intoxicated drivers are a prime time to just mention how important it is to not get in a car with an intoxicated driver. Young adults who have practiced those kinds of refusal skills as younger kids are probably less likely to be intoxicated drivers themselves.
I'm really not trying to tell people how to raise their children, but as somebody who spends 180 days a year with this age group, I think I have pretty good insight into what really goes on, and I just want everyone's kids to get to grow up and have lives. Life is precious but the young don't always know it.
Carol
RE: dangerous time of the year - Tink - 05-17-2014
Sit down with your kids and tell them they get a "free pass" good anytime of the day or night to bail them, and their friends out of a potential, bad situation. But if they got buzz on, tend to "forget" to look cool. Have a good think of how not to make them feel "not trusted" as to why you are having this talk with them and for them to trust you that it really is a free pass, cuz you were there once too.
Are you a human being, or a human doing?
RE: dangerous time of the year - mac nut - 05-17-2014
Thanks Carol for that post. I might also add be especially aware while driving at night when the drunks are more common.
RE: dangerous time of the year - Delta9r - 05-17-2014
We watched one of my grandsons graduate from preschool last night at the Honpa Hongwanji Hilo Betsuin Sangha Hall. It was great. They put on a production titled "Put on your dancing shoes," and sang a few cute songs.
Now I know why, a few weeks ago, he was running around singing, "What does the fox say?"
Refreshments were served afterward, and no alcohol was present.
My kids grew up watching me drink, and I think it had the effect of turning them off to drinking as neither of them are drinkers.
Our roads are dangerous enough (we have some of the deadliest roads in HI) without impaired driving, so thanks for bringing this to our attention.
"Life is labor, and all that is good in life comes from that labor..."
RE: dangerous time of the year - HereOnThePrimalEdge - 05-17-2014
Thanks Carol, that's a good reminder even for those of us without children in the home. If there's no need to drive late, it's probably better to stay home for the next few weeks. It might protect us, as well as any young people who are out and about, drinking and driving. With less traffic on the roads even impaired drivers have a better chance to make it home safely. It takes two to tango (or tangle) in a two car collision.
RE: dangerous time of the year - opihikao - 05-21-2014
Thank you, Carol. Bumping this for friendly reminder. This Friday & Saturday are graduation nights.
Be safe!
RE: dangerous time of the year - pam jones - 05-22-2014
Very timely advice. Just last week I was stuck in traffic thinking it was road construction (behind a Roberts Hawai'i bus, no less) only to be the first in line for the next group to go. Much to my horror police were cleaning-up the aftermath of a head-on in which an innocent victim later died! It has been over a week and I am still haunted by the scene and it didn't help that I was front row and center. There is no appointment, event or visit worth taking a life. A few more minutes of travel time won't make or break anyone. I went to enough funerals in high school to know drinking and driving is NOT cool!!
RE: dangerous time of the year - Kapohocat - 05-22-2014
quote:
Originally posted by Tink
Sit down with your kids and tell them they get a "free pass" good anytime of the day or night to bail them, and their friends out of a potential, bad situation. But if they got buzz on, tend to "forget" to look cool. Have a good think of how not to make them feel "not trusted" as to why you are having this talk with them and for them to trust you that it really is a free pass, cuz you were there once too.
Are you a human being, or a human doing?
I offer this same "free pass". Although I get to also offer the "look what I did when i thought I was sober enough to drive (at 22 yrs of age)" and show them my scars. I tell them been there done that and it is easier to tell your friends you are leaving, walk out to the gate, and jump into my car to get home. it's dark, no one will know it is auntie coming to get you. I also have had a group I took home.... told them since we were out lets go to Ken's and I am buying. They liked to tease about auntie being out and about at midnight or later. But you do what you gotta do to keep them safe.
Pam Jones, wish I had a group of them that saw that. Makes an impression. 9 weeks in the hospital was the only thing that made an impression on me at the time, unfortunately. And I was lucky. No one else hurt but me.
RE: dangerous time of the year - pam jones - 06-03-2014
Ironic how this subject still keeps wrecking lives. Just last week an ex-coworker was killed by a drunk driver. The last time I saw her was during a trip to Texas where she was the d.d. and drove me and another friend to a birthday party at a club in Houston. She was an exceptional human being in every respect and the grief, shock and that feeling of immense tragedy is something I will never get used to.[
!][][V]
RE: dangerous time of the year - Guest - 06-03-2014
The one sole reason this issue keeps wrecking lives is the inability of society to accept drunk driving for what its worth - attempted murder.
If a person walks down the street randomly firing a loaded gun, or the drunk drives down that same street - what is the difference?
And when either the bullet or the drunk kills someone, does it matter how the dead victim died?
No one can imagine the sheer hell of a human death thru that of a drunk driver. Unless you know the person killed.
I certainly know that pain.
My 3 brothers got to guest star in this Anti DUI MADD video made a few years back. Killed by a 5 time convicted drunk driver.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwJ56uZrtQM