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IBM memo to employees - Printable Version

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IBM memo to employees - Beachboy - 11-15-2007

I don't know how they wrote this with a straight face. This was a
real memo sent out by IBM to its employees in all seriousness. It went
to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem.








The author of this memo was quite genuine. The engineers rolled on
the floor! Especially note the last sentence.

Mouse Balls


"If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it
may need a ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU
(Field Replacement Units). Because of the delicate nature of this
procedure, a replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by
properly trained personnel. Before proceeding, determine the type of
mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls
will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures
differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can
be replaced using the pop off method. Domestic balls are replaced by
using the twist off method. Mouse balls are not usually static
sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.



Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used
immediately. It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare
balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer
missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of
removing and replacing these necessary items.



Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is
an unhappy customer."



Handle every situation like a dog,If you can't eat it or hump it,piss on it and walk away...