Amazon S-L-O-W shipping

[terracore]

So two days ago on March 27 I ordered an in-stock "Major Appliance" on Amazon (a microwave) and after two full days of no delivery update I used the amazon "chat" feature to inquire about it. Their ultimate response: The item wasn't actually in stock and the estimated delivery date was the end of MAY. Yes... skipping the end of March, the entire month of April, most of May, and then if I was lucky I would get the microwave sometime next fiscal quarter.

How long were they expecting to keep me on the hook for this? I have no idea. But our LG microwave is broke (don't buy them, they are garbage) and I'm sick of heating things on the stove like it's 1965. Ship me the microwave. SHIP ME THE DAMN MICROWAVE NOW AND I WILL AWAY.

So there we were. I had ordered an in-stock item they didn't have. They couldn't pull one out of the ether within a reasonable amount of time to make me (or anybody) happy. How was a company that built it's reputation on customer satisfaction going to handle this dilemma, I asked them.

Offer #1: I cancel my order with Amazon and buy through one of their affiliates and they refund 50% of the price difference.

"No."

Offer #2: I cancel my order with Amazon and buy through one of their affiliates and they refund 100% of the price difference.

"No." Yeah right, like one of their affiliates are going to ship to Hawaii for free: NICE TRY!

Offer #3: I will have the microwave in 3 days, guaranteed.

"Done!"

I checked my order and the microwave is not being fulfilled by Amazon, but they are eating the price difference and the expedited shipping costs to Hawaii (which likely far exceed the cost of the microwave). I don't feel great that they might lose money on the transaction, however if they never had the item to begin with, they should have never offered it for sale with a fake delivery estimate.