When you visit friends in Hawaii....

[csgray]

Just to clarify, not everyone who visited did all of those things, but collectively all of those things happened at one time or another. It did make us realize that a common set of ground rules that gets spelled out to all guests (even my mother in law) was necessary. I posted in hopes someone else might be spared the same aggravation.

The last guests were really the biggest offenders and if they return to Hawaii we will be happy to meet them for dinner in Hilo, and that is about all.

Carol

[Kapohocat]

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We have had these same guest issues! I made up a "guest Welcome Note" with helpful hints that I email with the directions from airport (hint hunt get a rental car!!) and if you email me I will send a copy for you to use as a template!

On the other hand, we have one guest and his family (aka my wonderful brother!) that we love to have them visit which they do 4-5 times or more a year. (They get to fly space available/NC.) They stop at Walmart on way to our house and pick up TP, paper towels, dish soap, etc as a "we're glad to stay with you" gift. And during their visit they buy dinner as often as we buy theirs! And they always leave some sweet gift as a "thank you"... this past month it was a cast iron skillet because they noticed ours had a hairline crack when we were searing ahi for them! I just had to acknowledge these guests from heaven! My guess is because they do travel a lot - they get it - they understand how much everything costs to have guests.

[KeaauRich]

Kapohocat...why don't you post the letter here? I'd love to see it.

Our "favorite" guests used to get up at 5 am and sit in the living room until one of us got up at our normal 5:30 am rising time. The first thing they'd say was "Is there any hot coffee?" I guess the coffee-making process is different on the mainland...

[maud gonne]

We have at least one guest or set of guests every month - we limited ourselves so that we have time off in between. But before we invite anyone to visit ( or before they invite themselves) I always give them the Big Disclaimer speech. It goes something like this: our place is extremely primitive. Think camping. Think no electric or running water. Think giant cockroaches, no tv, no wifi, no cell service.
This is somewhat of an exaggeration, but my problem with guests is that they think they're going to have a Hawaiian Vacation, and often end up bummed out because (1) we, and therefore they, have to work on the farm just to keep the jungle at bay, and (2)going to beaches or other points of interest is a rare occurrence.
I use the disclaimer to weed out the guests that wouldn't do well.

[David M]

For those that have never been to BI, I like to tell them "we don't live in postcard Hawaii"

David

Ninole Resident

[Royall]

Thank God!!!!

Royall

[macuu222]

My wife and I both have tons of friends and family scattered around the country. All our friends and family members can't afford the airfare to get over here and back...so we've never had that problem. It's one of the perks living on an island in the middle of the pacific!!!

[StillHope]

Most of people here are very far from being rich and work hard just to get by.Having guests,even good ones,it's not easy.

So why not have a friendly but serious conversation (or letter) discussing all possible problems?

You can always mention "the other guests" and your bills after as an example.

It's inconvenient,I know.

But it's much better than saying nothing (before or in the process)

,being "full of aloha" and later post all your "ahola"

(as the opposite of aloha) on a public forum.

Do you want your guest to read this? Looks like it.

(Screen names or not,your guests can figure it out,especially when your screen name has your real name in it).

So have a courage and honesty to talk to your guest in person or have your friend do it for you.
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I can see some exceptions - your son's boss is going to visit.
So smile and send your son the bill later![]

[dcl]

I found many of these posts to be informative. Also let's me know I am not alone in dealing with things sometimes.

I found nothing offensive about any of the posts.

I really am getting tired of people policing and putting negatives on everything any of us say anymore.

And yes my guests can read this if I have any and get a clue of the real world we live in here.

[Bob Orts]

When they call to let you know they are coming, just ask them for a credit card to hold their reservation and if the just want the room rate or will they be adding the meal package. [:0]