Hi Tim
I understand what you are saying, but it's hard for me to read a long post like that without white spaces such as you put in your original post. My eyes bounced off it. Edit? [
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While I agree with you about the big house being overkill and unnecessary, that is a matter of choice. Your reply didn't quite address what I said re people on the island also wanting the American Dream. You talked about people moving here from the mainland.
I was talking about people here. There are families here who are still in the coming up in the world phase, coming up from living in poor tiny plantation houses. They're not at the stage where they've attained it and they realize that it's empty. They still want the symbols of materialism because they've been out of reach.
Re the forest, as you get more town dwellers from Hilo moving to Puna, they may want to have homes with lawns. That is the style in Hilo, if you have noticed.
As for having a lawn, there's another area where East Hawai'i differs from the mainland. On the mainland, a lawn consumes water resources and may read as wasteful, especially in summer dry areas like California.
Here, the weeds are so tough that they overwhelm most ground cover (except JFITZ has some good options). It's a very viable way to control a cleared area because you can mow it and do away with the weeds, and the rain keeps the lawn green. I have a whole bunch of lawn and I don't water or fertilize it. A common landscape style here is to do islands of plantings surrounded by lawn, if the terrain is flat enough to mow. Conventional flower beds don't work very well because of the weeds.
Then if you want your house not to mold and be damp, you will clear around it so the sun can hit the entire wall and dry it out, or so I've been told by oldtimers here. I live in a high rainfall area and I have no mold and mildew issues because I have a clearing around my house and the trees are set back. It can rain for a month and I don't need a dehumidifier and I don't have funny smelling closets!
There are only so many ways to deal with a clearing. Pave it, gravel it, cinder it, plant it with lawn or ground cover. Weeds will grow in cinder or gravel. I have a lawn. It helps cool things off.
While I don't agree with bulldozing a lot, I have seen too many damp houses that were planted close to trees with that home in the forest look.
There is a lot to learn about living, building, growing in the tropics. Talk to a lot of people who've seen it all and you will learn why things are done why they are. It may not be for reasons that you imagined.
As far as tolerance goes, I will only repeat that this land is home to numerous ethnicities and mixtures who have very specific cultural values, and they are going to be different from you, with different values and different dreams. You are a minority and will remain so, and coming to terms with that will help you settle in.