04-06-2013, 01:20 PM
There are predatory people everywhere, and have been all through human history. Some people just like the challenge of getting in the middle of a couple, maybe it gives them some sort of sick satisfaction, or a sense of power. Hawaii is no different than anywhere else in that regard, human nature is the same everywhere. Anyone who doesn't know that infidelity happens is hopelessly naive, and won't listen to your tale of woe anyway, and those who aren't naive already know this stuff happens, and don't need to read the intimate details on what happened in your marriage. In my observation of the human condition, people who feel respected, valued, loved, supported, and listened to in their relationship are not tempted when some sweet talker tries to woo them. There has to be some sort of unmet need already there waiting to be exploited, and if there is an unmet need, there are those who will be right there to offer to fill it. The best way to prevent infidelity is to make sure you are treating your partner with the love and respect they need, not spying on their every move, only allowing them privacy in the bathroom, and publicly trumpeting the news of their misdeed on a public forum.
Why would anyone who is trying to survive something as potentially devastating as infidelity post about it on a public forum, especially with so many deeply private and personal details about your wife? Did she have any say on this being divulged to strangers? This post reeks of trying to publicly shame someone while wearing the disguise of a good Samaritan; The Scarlet Letter comes to mind.
Maybe I sound harsh here, but I have trouble believing that someone who sincerely wants to save their relationship would post something like this, instead it is the kind of thing someone would do if they want to publicly humiliate and punish their spouse. This is a small island as you said, and people who know you and your wife will read this, someone will put 2 and 2 together, and then it is just a matter of time until it is all over the coconut wireless. I hope you don't have kids who will have to hear the gossip. Talk about over sharing! I wish I had stopped at "It happened to our marriage-wife went off the rails....
Carol
Why would anyone who is trying to survive something as potentially devastating as infidelity post about it on a public forum, especially with so many deeply private and personal details about your wife? Did she have any say on this being divulged to strangers? This post reeks of trying to publicly shame someone while wearing the disguise of a good Samaritan; The Scarlet Letter comes to mind.
Maybe I sound harsh here, but I have trouble believing that someone who sincerely wants to save their relationship would post something like this, instead it is the kind of thing someone would do if they want to publicly humiliate and punish their spouse. This is a small island as you said, and people who know you and your wife will read this, someone will put 2 and 2 together, and then it is just a matter of time until it is all over the coconut wireless. I hope you don't have kids who will have to hear the gossip. Talk about over sharing! I wish I had stopped at "It happened to our marriage-wife went off the rails....
Carol
Carol
Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other people's nonsense, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Polish Proverb
Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other people's nonsense, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Polish Proverb