Paradise Park - Robbery / Help Needed

[dmbwest]

I want to buy a gun for "protection" here in "Puna"

I understand that if I also buy a "safe" then I will finally be a "responsible" gun owner.

I promise to never pull said gun out of the safe unless my home is being invaded, I am going hunting, to the range or just feel like fondling my gun.

I will talk about all the guns I have here on the internet and obliquely threaten any and all who may walk down my driveway or simply lift up my sliding window out of its track with a butter knife when I am not home.