03-09-2010, 03:36 PM
We have now weathered a deluge of mainland visitors, mostly family but also some old friends from my college days, and I have some insights to share with anyone who is thinking of visiting friends in Hawaii. Having friends or family to stay with in Hawaii is a blessing, if you want to be invited back try following a few simple suggestions:
#1 You may be on vacation, but your friends probably aren't.
A) Many people here in Hawaii get up early and go to bed early, so 9:30 at night is probably not a good time to settle down in the living room to recount your day's adventures. People who get up at 5 in the morning usually go to bed by 9.
B) Expecting your hosts to come home from work and cook dinner is asking a lot. Offer to pick up pizza, cook dinner or take them out. Do the dishes and kitchen cleanup. After all they are saving you the cost of a hotel room.
C) Clue your hosts into your time frames. If you are going to the Kona side, and won't be home for dinner, let them know. Nobody wants to come home from work and cook dinner for guests who never show up.
#2 Remember that EVERYTHING costs more here, TP, Paper towels, food, laundry and dish soap, and especially utilities. So turn out lights when you leave the room, take your dirty laundry home with you or take it to a laundry, replace what you use up. It shouldn't cost your hosts an extra $100 a week for you to have a great vacation in Hawaii.
#3 If the house is on catchment and a drought is mentioned, pay close attention to water use. That means short showers, efficient tooth brushing and dish washing, and generally being conscious about how you use water. Remember, if the water runs low it will cost $130 and a several day wait for water delivery.
#3 Don't send out snarky emails about the local culture to an email list that includes your hosts before you even send the thank you note.
#4 Do send a thank you note, if possible buy them that useful thing you noticed they needed for their house. Ask what they might need for you to bring them from the mainland that they can't get here.
#5 Do not lose or abuse your host's stuff. If they loan you beach equipment, towels, maps, guide books etc. treat it with respect and return it in the same condition you got it in. Your friends have that stuff for you to use because they invested in it, be responsible enough to make sure they get it back the same way you got it. That way, future visitors can also use those resources.
#6 If your hosts have pets, obey house rules. If the pets can't be on the furniture, don't encourage them to jump up there because you miss snuggling with your pets. If begging for people food from the table is against the rules, don't sneak scraps from your plate to the dogs. They aren't your pets, don't spoil them.
Don't get me wrong, we loved seeing our family and friends, but now that the bills are rolling in and we can't find my favorite bird book, I am realizing the true costs of everyone else's Hawaii vacation. It was great to see everyone, but I ended up working too hard keeping people fed and the kitchen clean, and ended up not getting anywhere enough sleep for most of the winter because our guests just didn't understand a few simple things about visiting in Hawaii.
Carol
#1 You may be on vacation, but your friends probably aren't.
A) Many people here in Hawaii get up early and go to bed early, so 9:30 at night is probably not a good time to settle down in the living room to recount your day's adventures. People who get up at 5 in the morning usually go to bed by 9.
B) Expecting your hosts to come home from work and cook dinner is asking a lot. Offer to pick up pizza, cook dinner or take them out. Do the dishes and kitchen cleanup. After all they are saving you the cost of a hotel room.
C) Clue your hosts into your time frames. If you are going to the Kona side, and won't be home for dinner, let them know. Nobody wants to come home from work and cook dinner for guests who never show up.
#2 Remember that EVERYTHING costs more here, TP, Paper towels, food, laundry and dish soap, and especially utilities. So turn out lights when you leave the room, take your dirty laundry home with you or take it to a laundry, replace what you use up. It shouldn't cost your hosts an extra $100 a week for you to have a great vacation in Hawaii.
#3 If the house is on catchment and a drought is mentioned, pay close attention to water use. That means short showers, efficient tooth brushing and dish washing, and generally being conscious about how you use water. Remember, if the water runs low it will cost $130 and a several day wait for water delivery.
#3 Don't send out snarky emails about the local culture to an email list that includes your hosts before you even send the thank you note.
#4 Do send a thank you note, if possible buy them that useful thing you noticed they needed for their house. Ask what they might need for you to bring them from the mainland that they can't get here.
#5 Do not lose or abuse your host's stuff. If they loan you beach equipment, towels, maps, guide books etc. treat it with respect and return it in the same condition you got it in. Your friends have that stuff for you to use because they invested in it, be responsible enough to make sure they get it back the same way you got it. That way, future visitors can also use those resources.
#6 If your hosts have pets, obey house rules. If the pets can't be on the furniture, don't encourage them to jump up there because you miss snuggling with your pets. If begging for people food from the table is against the rules, don't sneak scraps from your plate to the dogs. They aren't your pets, don't spoil them.
Don't get me wrong, we loved seeing our family and friends, but now that the bills are rolling in and we can't find my favorite bird book, I am realizing the true costs of everyone else's Hawaii vacation. It was great to see everyone, but I ended up working too hard keeping people fed and the kitchen clean, and ended up not getting anywhere enough sleep for most of the winter because our guests just didn't understand a few simple things about visiting in Hawaii.
Carol
Carol
Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other people's nonsense, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Polish Proverb
Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other people's nonsense, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Polish Proverb