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Is Anyone Else on PunaWeb Sick of This?
#1
Why is it that every thread, no matter how innocuous the topic, seems to elicit unnecessary personal attacks, name calling, rude comments and sarcastic back biting? Is it impossible to disagree with someone without totally insulting and disparaging them? If a topic expands slightly from the original narrow thought, is it automatically "hijacking" and cause for cynicism and derision? Has this become a place where some posters can only feel good about themselves by making someone else feel bad?

I used to love coming to PunaWeb for the treasure trove of great information and the camaraderie among my neighbors. But lately PunaWeb has become a cesspool of negativity despite Rob's best and admirable efforts to encourage adult behavior.

How can we bring aloha back to PunaWeb?
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#2
Thank you for pointing this out, KeaauRich. I agree with you, and the tenor makes me, if not others, back off from participating in what used to be a friendly and informative forum. Obie's response to Kathy H in the "Something rotten in Hilo" topic is a perfect example (innocuous topic/disparaging comment/personal attack/accusation of hijacking).
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#3
I think there are a handfull of people who look at it as a challenge and an honour to be as disruptive as possible in the hopes of joining their comrades in being expelled from the puna forums.
I don't know, maybe they even all get the same celibratory tatoo?
I have seen a few of these people on the side and they seemed obsessed with putting down Punatalk, their lives and comments seem to be wrapped around it.
I still recommend Punatalk to people, especially those who are new to the island for the wealth of info. I do though, find myself of late , warning them of some of the "small sandbox " mentality that they will at times find.

riverwolf
riverwolf
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#4
KeeauRich, that was/is my feelings about punaweb as well. I was so excited to find this resource a couple of years ago, and have gleaned so much helpful information, and have met many friends through it. Rob does a great job. Yet, I've gone away from it many times shaking my head like, give me a break, there's not enough drama in life without the negative attacking stuff? And then I do come back to it, because through out the negative bs, there is the postive people and positive posting. I still love punaweb - but yes, some people do need to get a better life...

Enjoy the day! Ann
Enjoy the day! Ann
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#5
KeaauRich asks a good question and it is worth exploring. I don't agree that every topic or many topics in fact elicit personal attacks but when they occur it can certainly seem that way.

This phenomena is not unique to Punaweb or to the internet. It has unfortunately become a structural part of our national dialogue and Puna is not exempt. I attribute it to a few factors:

Puna has grown.... a lot. We have acquired a large number of what I would call refugees from the mainland and from other islands. They were often driven out by rising costs of living. Many of them did not come here for the culture. They came here because the land was affordable and they packed their bags with the culture they were leaving and brought their fears and anxieties to Puna.

Fear and anxiety. People are afraid and anxious and there are plenty of things to be afraid of. Most of the sources of fear are things that are out of the control of any individual. Different people deal with it in different ways and one way seems to manifest itself in antisocial or personally agressive ways.

Anonymity. Like wearing a mask at a costume ball some people act in disguise in ways they would not do in public. But then again some people are just the way they are.

Thinking of Punaweb and the way it once was is like thinking of anything the way it used to be. All of our home towns and personal touch stones have changed. Puna too. What Punaweb will be in the future is up to us.

I think Punaweb has been doing rather well lately all in all. In managing the site I and the Operating Committee are a bit slow in reaction time. I admit that. We do not have the energy to beat back every perceived slight. Our basic intent is to protect a community forum - not to protect adults from each other. When Punaweb starts to transform from a community forum to a mental health facility we get busy.

I read a forum in my old hometown in California and get really depressed. The other day a resident there drowned in the ocean. 80% of the posters were ridiculing the deceased, the lifeguards, each other and unrelated nonsense. It was really depressing. I am glad I am here. Punaweb is actually doing very well by comparison.

I will continue to advise our members to not take the bait when baited. It can be hard to do. It is however the most effective response. The Operating Committee and I will likely not take as long as we used to to rein in repeat offenders. I think it was a mistake in the past to let some ill intended people carry on for so long. I have lost all patience with people who lay awake at night thinking of how to antagonize others. I still try to be sympathetic and realize that everyone is having problems... and some of them bring them here.

I do thank our members for making and keeping Punaweb a valuable resource. I would encourage the well intended (most all of you) to stand your ground and not be dissuaded from posting. If you have complaints send them to me and I will bring it to the attention of the Operating Committee. This process always takes several days. In a more timely manner I will reluctantly admonish people from time to time. Believe it or not I do not read every post and some things need to be brought to my attention.

Let's all try to Live Aloha and in doing so show others how it is done.

Assume the best and ask questions.

Punaweb moderator
Assume the best and ask questions.

Punaweb moderator
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#6
Actually Punaweb is "the" most informative vehicle for information dealing with Hawaii and Puna in particular that I've ever seen. It's faster than any other communication medium here in Hawaii because of it's members. When that earthquake happened in Japan and created a tsunami....It was on punaweb before even the news channels got hold of it.

Punaweb is a credit to it's owner as well as it's members(even the argumentative ones!).
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#7
This "rudeness" happens on every forum. For various reasons if people don't interact face to face there's a handful that have no polite filter. Also written text can easily be taken as angry w/o the normal smiles and human interaction face to face. Another way of avoiding confrontation is to leave your thoughts and don't even attempt to justify them after the fact.
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#8
I too have been disappointed by new antagonism on PW. It used to just be confined to guns and dogs and weed, and politics.

On another forum I visit, a situation happened and the person attacked was very polite with his explanation, (and I had thought OH NO HERE WE GO! ) The person attacking apologized nicely when he realized he was incorrect.... and you would be surprised at who the party was.

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#9
I have been one of the "original members" of punaweb since Day 1, and I used to post a lot here because it was a friendly place with nice people. It has changed so much the last year or so that I do not even post in any other threads anymore but real estate here. Unfortunately, the not so nice people here even attack on facts posted too. I disagree with Rob about "Punaweb has been doing rather well lately" but that's his determination to make.

Aloha,
John S. Rabi, GM,PB,ABR,CRB,CM,FHS
888.819.9669
johnrabi@johnrabi.com
http://www.JohnRabi.com
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#10
TheodoreJay,
This "rudeness" may be the norm on other forums, but until fairly recently Punaweb was mostly free of that kind of behavior. There has been a recent influx of people who want to bring the lack of manners common elsewhere to Punaweb, and as a result are chasing off many long term members. It is possible to disagree without launching the kind of personal attacks we are now seeing.

For long term participants here it feels like we had a nice friendly little corner coffee shop that got invaded by loud, rowdy, drunks who spend their time yelling at everyone and challenging them to fights (calling them out). It has taken a pleasant place for friendly informative interactions and turned it into a place where even the simplest post is challenged with vicious personal attacks on the basis of either facts, style, or just having a bad attitude about the poster.

There is a whole set of guys who seem to just wait for Kathy H. to post so they can jump all over her, not one of them has been on Punaweb as long as she has, so she was part of the landscape when they got here. They need to just get over it, and ignore her posts if they don't like her style.

Carol
Carol

Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other people's nonsense, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Polish Proverb
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