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I have been thinking all day how to word this. But I have decided to go ahead and share what happened today to my son and I. I have been taking my son to a club that meets in a public venue. He has a fairly obvious disability, but is defined as "high functioning". The club meets for 4 hours, and we go for- at the most-, 1 hr. Two of the club members (at least)are aware of my son's diagnosed disability. Today, upon entering the public venue- I was told- by a state employee- that "there had been complaints by the "older" members of the club- and that my son would not longer be able to participate". I asked to speak to the "president of the club"- and subsequently later- confronted the state employee- and spoke to the manager. Basically, my point is that "people with disabilities deserve to be able to participate in public venues of games/entertainment". They should not "just be thrown out" or "hidden in a room" away from other people. We all need to be tolerant of one another. There is both a child and adult section of the club- and it is beyond my comprehension why "people in their 50's and 60's would create such an uproar" - but it is exactly what has happened. Why wasn't I asked to "just keep him over with the other kids?". I don't know if I am witnessing the complete breakdown of our society or what- but I do recall in France where the homeless were given change and a smile. Where is the tolerance in the US for those less fortunate?? I am so sick and tired of the judgmental attitudes that I feel frequently at odds with.
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Sound not only intolerant, but probably also illegal, as it probably breaks anti-discrimination laws. Unfortunately, it only takes a few assholes to ruin any club or organization. And then if you fight for your right to attend, you'll be left with feeling whether you really want to associate with people like that or go somewhere with more quality members. There's no perfect solution. My condolences.
I'm so sorry that happened to you, Julie.
This is in no way an excuse, but the people in their 60's grew up in a time when the disabled were not visible. However, it's been decades since things have changed, so time to get with the new ways.
My grandson is disabled, and I am not sure how high-functioning is defined but he is certainly verbal and often starts conversations with strangers (misses social cues). I would be upset if I took him somewhere and he were asked to leave. Sometimes I decide on my own to pack it in.
Hunt makes a good point though that now you know what these people think, you might not enjoy being around them -- I suppose it depends on what kind of club it is. Hard to tell (I see you are being discreet).
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I'm amazed. As HS says it may be illegal, and what are they thinking for heavens sake? 50 or 60 is not too old to know better. And I don't buy that the disabled used to be neither seen nor heard. I'm that age (soonish) and that was never the "rule". Quite the opposite.
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When I brought it to the supervisor's attention, he immediately told me, "Your son can participate. We will try to accommodate him". But the initial situation was that I walked in the door, and the other state employee came up and told me that my "son would no longer be able to participate". I made such an uproar over it, and I also had confronted the initial state employee and told her that "you can't treat people with disabilities this way"... Of course by this time I was in tears. No accommodation is needed anyhow, My son has good and bad days and if he's struggling, then I take him home. I am already leaving my other 2 kids at home for the meeting of this club- so that I can concentrate on "trying to have my son behave". It is just disheartening. It is one of the only things my son really enjoys- and he's good at it too- on a good day.
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It would be difficult to know for certain whether the complaints were made because the people were 60 years old, or whether it was simply in their nature to be cranky, or maybe they were having a bad day. To claim their comments were made because of their age would be the same as stating they made them because they were all the same race, color, or religion. It's the one piece of information that was offered to us about the people making the complaint, but we don't know for certain that their age was the true cause for their actions.
"I'm at that stage in life where I stay out of discussions. Even if you say 1+1=5, you're right - have fun." - Keanu Reeves
Yep, +++ don't even know what the "club" or activity is. A little vague UK.
If you so pissed off, why are you withholding details ?
Everyone wants and has a right to they own space.
Maybe they don't even know about your son's disability ?
Why can't he join the child section ???
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If there was a state employee involved at a public facility it's probably an ADA violation
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The good news UJ is that I see a large financial windfall in your future should you wish to pursue legal action. From what you said this is a clear violation of ADA.
I truly hope you write a letter to the state agency in charge of the facility you ere at (or the dept. of said employee.) Did you know that the Governor has 2 staff people in Hilo whose job it is to investigate and respond to concerns from east Hawaii residents.
If I were you would:
write a letter to the governor and cc to the Hilo staff (remember it's an election year)
write a letter to the state agency of said employee
Let them know you are pursuing all possible avenues of recourse including legal action. If you do not hear back from them in a week, forward the letters to KHON's help line. You'd be amazed at what happens when tv stations get involved.
It is truly unfortunate that you and your son had to go through this. I have friends with disabled kids and if this happened to them, they would be dining the bell loud and clear.
Yeah go head act up ... You guys don't even know other side of story.
