Infidelity in Paradise

[rainshadow]

I didn't read this - I agree with Carol.
Good luck, best wishes.

-- rainshadow

[Daniel]

“Every marriage is subject to occasional stormy weather. But with patience, mutual respect, and a spirit of forbearance, we can weather these storms. Where mistakes have been made, there can be apology, repentance, and forgiveness. But there must be willingness to do so on the part of both parties.

I believe in the family where there is a husband who regards his companion as his greatest asset and treats her accordingly; where there is a wife who looks upon her husband as her anchor and strength, her comfort and security; where there are children who look to mother and father with respect and gratitude; where there are parents who look upon those children as blessings and find a great and serious and wonderful challenge in their nurture and rearing. The cultivation of such a home requires effort and energy, forgiveness and patience, love and endurance and sacrifice; but it is worth all of these and more.

I have learned that the real essence of happiness in marriage lies not so much in romance as in an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion. Thinking of self alone and of the gratification of personal desires will build neither trust, love, nor happiness. Only when there is unselfishness will love, with its concomitant qualities, flourish and blossom.

Marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership of equals, with neither exercising dominion over the other, but, rather, with each encouraging and assisting the other in whatever responsibilities and aspirations he or she might have.” Gordon B. Hinckley, I Believe, Ensign, August 1992

Daniel R Diamond

[coppercoin40]

I think you are airing your attempt to "help" people in the wrong place. If you really want to help people in this situation why don't you team up with a marital counselor or on a forum specific to marital relations.

I agree that this topic is unrelated to Puna, it is an issue that can happen to anyone, anywhere. Even though you say you are not phishing, right now I am certain you are...

This is my last post on this topic, hopefully others will follow suit and not feed your thread. Let's let this topic die off and roll off the page folks.

[DanielP]

Face it. If your partner "cheats" the "relationship" is PAU. Move along and start to rebuild with someone else.

[ericlp]

My last post. Well, Some people can get back together after Infidelity... Very few people I agree.

One thing I know is ... If you partner has controlling or trust issues it's not gonna work out. Sharing passwords and keeping tabs on your partner is a trust issue and if you can't trust your partner you'll never get back to a "RELATIONSHIP" ... It's no fun for anyone and you should either seek professional help or move on to someone you can trust.

Good Luck!

[brokentrust]

I have to disagree about the trust. I know that my wife will generally do the right things, the idea is that with transparency the temptation or possibility to be careless, and follow a incremental path to trouble is incredibly lessened. This is a two way street, she has access to everything also.

Let me try this from another tact, in a commonly understood marriage, why should there be concealment from the partners?

I think our lives and biology, haven't been able to keep track with the pace of technology, and interconnectedness. 30 years ago people were obviously having affairs, and 3,000 years ago - but the ability to form pseudo-intimate relationships, with a few clicks of a button wasn't even conceivable to most people. The internet has accelerated the pace of everything, and the old rules and approaches don't necessarily work.

[Greg]

I truly believe that an old Volkswagen bug with slightly larger tires will perform in most situations as well as a four wheel drive.

[terracore]

quote:

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Originally posted by Greg

I truly believe that an old Volkswagen bug with slightly larger tires will perform in most situations as well as a four wheel drive.

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Helicopters.

[dmbwest]

Ha na Greg,

I have a whole list of things I have done with Air Cooled VW's with 'tires'

Pulled Mexicans out of sand ( IN MEXICO ), plowed over the bumper snow ( uphill ), etc ...

Thanks.
aloha,
pog

[DanielP]

Larger tires needed in the rear only. Small tires in front OK.